The best part is where you said we can “just be”. After a hectic life, it’s nice to “just be”, read books, take photographs of nature, set on a park bench. It’s lovely.
I had a hectic medical career for 30 years, went through a divorce, lost my Mom pretty early, lots of other things. I was the first generation to go to college. I went from a graduating class of 18 to a major University of 25,000. Upward mobility is always hard. Yup, I’m ready for R & R and to do what I want. Finally. Just hope it lasts a long time.
I'm hoping my dad's dementia (started around age 84) doesn't mean I'm going to get it. I'm trying to feel encouraged by all these active over-80 people, but I wonder how many had a parent with dementia/Alzheimer's.
There are many kinds of dementia, of which Alzheimer's is one. Alzheimer's is thought to be hereditary but not certain, like if your father had red hair, you could get it but you could also not get it. Best of luck to you.
Oh boy, reading that was tough until I remembered That’s Not Me! I’ll be 80 in November. I’m still working part time in the medical field (oncology) and also work for an adoption agency fostering newborn babies. I get them from the hospital, usually 2 days old, and keep them until they are permanently placed. I have 5 children and 10 grandchildren. Most of them think I’m sane. 😂
I am fortunate to have had ancestors who lived long lives on both sides. But they were all very active up into their 80s and 90s. They had very balanced diets and, for the most part, good habits. Then there was my grandfather, who smoked Camel straights (unfiltered) and drank way too much alcohol. He lived to 91. You just never know......
It did my heart good to see so many others who, like me, are living our fullest past 80. I love this life and see every day as a gift. Thank you for highlighting the fact that closing in on 80 and beyond is often a blessing and not a curse.
Yes, I just thought all the things people told me in response to my one little note deserved a wider airing. And they do add up when put all together. It did my heart good, too. Other people’s ageism doesn’t bother me all that much, because it doesn’t stop me from standing on my head or doing whatever I want to do, but I think younger people (who may be in their 50s) should know that you don’t have to be over the hill. One of my most popular posts is about my dad starting an affair at the age of 90 https://arichardson.substack.com/p/when-do-people-stop-having-sex
Ann, I really enjoyed your round-up of what your viral note brought about. I am always inspired by examples of people in their 80s, 90s and beyond who are able to do anything and everything "they" want to do.
What that life looks like varies by person, but they all show me hope that it's possible to not live a life of disease and disability as you get older, which is all I saw in my own family.
I do hope though that as time goes on and more and more people are thriving at these ages, it stops being something extraordinary to people that others can live fully in their own way later in life, and becomes a lot more accepted as the norm.
Sounds pretty able and energetic, both of you, Rosa Maria. My work (writing for other people) just slowed down in my early 70s, which worked out fine for me. But I love all the things we older people get up to.
When I talked about slowing down, I meant that the paid work that came my way (I worked freelance) slowed down, eventually coming to a halt. I like to think I ALWAYS think about my writing!
Alternately encouraged and exhausted by the lists of activities, and I'm only 71. I was relieved by the "just be" section. I am enjoying this part of elderhood too much to have so many calendar items, preferring to act on a whim whenever possible or just be, enjoying long days to write or read or play music. Thanks for this Ann.
I know what you mean. I’m not one of those people rushing around, but am glad I have sufficient energy to write this Substack, albeit only fortnightly. I spend a lot of time chatting to my husband and keeping the house going. But it’s nice to know they’re there. And I couldn’t resist showing what other people can do, even I can’t (or don’t want to).
I love that you shared all these wonderful comments, Ann! (I have a soft spot for the alligator killer, but who could not?!)
I know someone younger than me who will not stop talking about her age. She is incredulous that I don't agree with her assessment that a number indicates a preordained level of infirmity. But her reality is hers, and she is living it. I do not and will not share it. Based on the comments you received, I am in good company. 😊
I simply couldn’t resist writing the article - it just sort-of wrote itself! I did the same thing when a previous Note went viral - you probably saw it already https://arichardson.substack.com/p/what-makes-a-marriage-work-your-viewsI find it fun to collect and set out other people’s responses - it’s what I did for a lot of my life, writing reports and articles based on qualitative research. As for your friend, all I can say is that we all age at different rates. I couldn’t do a lot of the things listed in my post, but I am grateful for what I’ve got. And it depends on circumstances. I now spend quite a bit of time looking after my husband - accompanying him to doctors appointments etc etc, which limits my range.
DJT deserves no comment. I accept the fact of my physical and mental decline at age 88 but am getting physical therapy. Foxdale Village has many residents well past 80, 90, and even 100 who are energetic and doing remarkable things, though none has get killed an alligator.
At 91 I'm getting a bit disgusted with certain words, overused words that is. Starting with "elderly", adding a combination "doing well for her age"; really? Who drew the lines? Perhaps we could talk it over. You pick the subject.
I feel like any comment that includes "doing well for xxxx", is some form of odd backhanded compliment. Being a younger person I haven't myself had the age one yet but I can relate to similar somewhat sexist comments around "strong...for a woman" etc. Why can't someone just be strong or doing well!
The best part is where you said we can “just be”. After a hectic life, it’s nice to “just be”, read books, take photographs of nature, set on a park bench. It’s lovely.
Yes, Joyce, I really don’t think we all need to be climbing mountains. We’re all different in how we want to be.
I had a hectic medical career for 30 years, went through a divorce, lost my Mom pretty early, lots of other things. I was the first generation to go to college. I went from a graduating class of 18 to a major University of 25,000. Upward mobility is always hard. Yup, I’m ready for R & R and to do what I want. Finally. Just hope it lasts a long time.
I'm hoping my dad's dementia (started around age 84) doesn't mean I'm going to get it. I'm trying to feel encouraged by all these active over-80 people, but I wonder how many had a parent with dementia/Alzheimer's.
There are many kinds of dementia, of which Alzheimer's is one. Alzheimer's is thought to be hereditary but not certain, like if your father had red hair, you could get it but you could also not get it. Best of luck to you.
Wonderful, all of it! Thank you for doing your bit to challenge and expand minds in your own way, Ann.
I do what I can.
Oh boy, reading that was tough until I remembered That’s Not Me! I’ll be 80 in November. I’m still working part time in the medical field (oncology) and also work for an adoption agency fostering newborn babies. I get them from the hospital, usually 2 days old, and keep them until they are permanently placed. I have 5 children and 10 grandchildren. Most of them think I’m sane. 😂
Well, that sounds like a lot on your plate, Charlotte. I wouldn't be sane caring for all those babies, but we're all different.
I am fortunate to have had ancestors who lived long lives on both sides. But they were all very active up into their 80s and 90s. They had very balanced diets and, for the most part, good habits. Then there was my grandfather, who smoked Camel straights (unfiltered) and drank way too much alcohol. He lived to 91. You just never know......
It works the other way, too - people who do all the right things re eating and exercise and end up dying at 60. Quite a lot of luck involved.
Love it! Good health helps you be able to be, and being helps you maintain good health - at any age! 😄
Sounds about right.
It did my heart good to see so many others who, like me, are living our fullest past 80. I love this life and see every day as a gift. Thank you for highlighting the fact that closing in on 80 and beyond is often a blessing and not a curse.
Ageism is the real curse.
Yes, I just thought all the things people told me in response to my one little note deserved a wider airing. And they do add up when put all together. It did my heart good, too. Other people’s ageism doesn’t bother me all that much, because it doesn’t stop me from standing on my head or doing whatever I want to do, but I think younger people (who may be in their 50s) should know that you don’t have to be over the hill. One of my most popular posts is about my dad starting an affair at the age of 90 https://arichardson.substack.com/p/when-do-people-stop-having-sex
Ann, I really enjoyed your round-up of what your viral note brought about. I am always inspired by examples of people in their 80s, 90s and beyond who are able to do anything and everything "they" want to do.
What that life looks like varies by person, but they all show me hope that it's possible to not live a life of disease and disability as you get older, which is all I saw in my own family.
I do hope though that as time goes on and more and more people are thriving at these ages, it stops being something extraordinary to people that others can live fully in their own way later in life, and becomes a lot more accepted as the norm.
Thank you. I completely agree about making it normal. Indeed, I wrote the same thoughts in my post Just Keep Going, which you probably saw.
My mother, at 89, goes to painting, drawing, dancing, and yoga classes. I, at 64, still am a working veterinarian; my scars and fissures prove it.
Sounds pretty able and energetic, both of you, Rosa Maria. My work (writing for other people) just slowed down in my early 70s, which worked out fine for me. But I love all the things we older people get up to.
I do not consider what you are doing slowing down, rather, thinking more about what to put down in writing.
Now, about the Obese Orange: imagine him riding a bicycle like Biden, who also is still able to wave at people in passing, and greeted back in return.
He would need a tricycle wide enough for his big back cheeks, and would end up panting after barely an hundred yards. The spectacle!
When I talked about slowing down, I meant that the paid work that came my way (I worked freelance) slowed down, eventually coming to a halt. I like to think I ALWAYS think about my writing!
Alternately encouraged and exhausted by the lists of activities, and I'm only 71. I was relieved by the "just be" section. I am enjoying this part of elderhood too much to have so many calendar items, preferring to act on a whim whenever possible or just be, enjoying long days to write or read or play music. Thanks for this Ann.
I know what you mean. I’m not one of those people rushing around, but am glad I have sufficient energy to write this Substack, albeit only fortnightly. I spend a lot of time chatting to my husband and keeping the house going. But it’s nice to know they’re there. And I couldn’t resist showing what other people can do, even I can’t (or don’t want to).
I love that you shared all these wonderful comments, Ann! (I have a soft spot for the alligator killer, but who could not?!)
I know someone younger than me who will not stop talking about her age. She is incredulous that I don't agree with her assessment that a number indicates a preordained level of infirmity. But her reality is hers, and she is living it. I do not and will not share it. Based on the comments you received, I am in good company. 😊
I simply couldn’t resist writing the article - it just sort-of wrote itself! I did the same thing when a previous Note went viral - you probably saw it already https://arichardson.substack.com/p/what-makes-a-marriage-work-your-viewsI find it fun to collect and set out other people’s responses - it’s what I did for a lot of my life, writing reports and articles based on qualitative research. As for your friend, all I can say is that we all age at different rates. I couldn’t do a lot of the things listed in my post, but I am grateful for what I’ve got. And it depends on circumstances. I now spend quite a bit of time looking after my husband - accompanying him to doctors appointments etc etc, which limits my range.
DJT deserves no comment. I accept the fact of my physical and mental decline at age 88 but am getting physical therapy. Foxdale Village has many residents well past 80, 90, and even 100 who are energetic and doing remarkable things, though none has get killed an alligator.
Alligators avoid Pennsylvania
Well, there’s still time for some alligator killing, Art, if they set their minds to it.
At 85 I am completing my 8th novel. Go to the gym, and meet friends when ever possible. Every day is a gift... not a number.
You’re a testament to the potential energy of octogenarians, Pat.
We can just be… Yes!
A great place to be, Rita, when you can just be. Perhaps you have found it so yourself.
Some days better than others 🤗
I know what you mean. The ‘down’ days are very annoying.
Less than four years till my 80s. What inspiring examples!
At 91 I'm getting a bit disgusted with certain words, overused words that is. Starting with "elderly", adding a combination "doing well for her age"; really? Who drew the lines? Perhaps we could talk it over. You pick the subject.
I feel like any comment that includes "doing well for xxxx", is some form of odd backhanded compliment. Being a younger person I haven't myself had the age one yet but I can relate to similar somewhat sexist comments around "strong...for a woman" etc. Why can't someone just be strong or doing well!
Good question, Natalie. Humans tend to come with expectations and assumptions, so they are surprised when we stand on our heads at 80!
I just did. I write about loads of things we old people can do, including standing my head and sex ( but not at the same time!)