Killing Alligators and Other Things We Get Up to in Our 80s and Beyond

Thought for the Fortnight

Photo by David Cashbaugh, Unsplash

It was the middle of the night. Awake, because I don’t sleep well, I turned on a podcast to distract myself until I felt sleepy.

They were discussing Trump and suggesting that his faculties were not what they once were. But, said one, we need to be cautious because, “it happens to all of us – he’s about to be 80 after all.”

That woke me up further. No, I thought, that’s just wrong. It doesn’t happen to all of us. Some of us, yes of course, but not everyone aged 80 and above.

There wasn’t much I could do about it. I considered writing to the podcasters, but decided they undoubtedly receive too many comments for my thoughts to be noticed.

But several days later, I thought of Substack. Why not write a Note expressing my ire.

Substack readers

And so I did.

I wrote:

I heard someone on a podcast, talking about Trump’s apparent physical and mental diminution, saying “Well, it happens to all of us - he’s about to be 80, after all”.

No, it damn well doesn’t happen to all of us. Some of us, for sure, but I am not the only 80+ year old writing lucidly on Substack. Wake up and look around. Ageing does not have to mean disabilities.

It clearly hit a nerve. Over 5600 ‘likes’, more than 250 re-stacks and loads and loads of comments.

My Note had gone viral.

First, I should have realised that any mention of President Trump – however irrelevant to the main point – brings out a wave of comments pro and con. On Substack, mainly con. Readers seem unable to resist some contribution.

Well, Trump happens to be the 80-year-old who stimulated the comment and my reaction. I wasn’t intending to start a conversation about him.

I failed.

Second, readers called attention to a host of other people in their 80s and above in public life and doing well.

A very mixed group. Bernie Sanders, Jane Fonda, Ian McKellen, Mick Jagger, Harrison Ford, Paul McCartney, Morgan Freeman, Martha Stewart, Dolly Parton and Warren Buffet all got a mention, plus a few others.

And one noted that David Attenborough, still active in his profession, had just turned 100.

Third, a few people wrote about their own accomplishments:

(all quotations mildly edited, where appropriate, for brevity)

“I’m 88 and doing just fine. I keep two Substack publications going, I clean my own house, drive my own car, make my own decisions, and my brain has not let me down yet.”

“I agree with you, as I head off to Zumba class at 82!”

“I am an 80+ person, and I write lucidly and thoughtfully here on Substack every day. I bring wit, wisdom, and occasionally satire to Substack.”

“I am 82 and seriously learning to sing…and to play the ukulele. I told my teacher this is not a hobby. And he said yes, I can tell that.”

“I am 80 and writing an annotation of a hieroglyphics dictionary printed in 1925.”

But mostly, the Note brought out descriptions of a wonderful set of octogenarians and above who they knew:

“My yoga teacher is 92. My best friend is a sprightly 85-year-old. Most of my friends who go drumming in the park with me are over 75. I am the youngster.”

“A very dear friend of mine played a chess match to a draw with the then very young British Grand Master. My friend was 93, still playing tennis and sharp as a tack. She died at 103.”

“I just played competitive bridge against a 93-year-old who is damn good and better than me, twenty years younger.”

And even more wrote about various relatives:

“My 84-year-old hubby is putting a new sprinkler system in our huge back yard. He dug up hundreds of feet of sod, filled in with two tons of rock and 60 bags of garden soil already this summer.”

“When she was 80, my aunt rode a donkey from the harbor to the center of Fira, on Santorini. When she went home to Florida, she accidentally nailed an adult male alligator between the eyes with a blind drive on the 9th hole of her country club, (sadly) killing it; the game wardens had been trying to catch it for months. She lived to 102.”

“My father is 91 and just wrote his most recent paper for a major scientific journal.”

“My 92-year-old mother-in-law, a native New Yorker, still walks everywhere, attends several events weekly, takes two classes a semester, goes to OT twice a week, paints nearly every day, just published a memoir – and runs us all ragged when she visits. I am tired just writing this!”

“My grandfather closed up his law practice age 90. And got down to uncover seed corn in his garden to check on its germination age 95.”

There were many more. This gives a flavour of the responses.

My view of us octogenarians

I don’t think it matters whether we can dig up our gardens, publish scholarly texts or kill alligators. That’s the fun part for those who get their pleasures in these diverse ways – and I congratulate them one and all.

But we’re also doing just fine if all we do is read a book, chat to our grandchildren or quietly think about Life or even nothing much at all. The point is we are still enjoying our lives and, perhaps, helping others.

The occasional commentator also called attention to this:

“At almost 85 I still have all my marbles! So thankful I can still enjoy birding and taking walks along the ocean.”

“I had a great-grandmother in her 90’s who was a delight to just sit and chat with. She was articulate, opinionated but funny too.”

In fact, one of the joys of being old is that we don’t have to prove ourselves to anyone.

We can just BE.

PS And the best of luck to those among us who had the bad luck to develop poor health in their older years, whether dementia or other diseases.

So who do you know and what do they do? Are your relatives of 80+ jumping out of helicopters or simply passing on their wisdom to those around them.

No comments on President Trump, please.